The Displaced Nation

A home for international creatives

12 NOMADS OF CHRISTMAS: Lyn Fuchs, American expat in Mexico (5/12)

Current home: Oaxaca, Mexico
Past overseas locations: India, Japan, Kenya, Canada
Cyberspace coordinates: Sacred Ground Travel Magazine (blog) and @LynFuchs (Twitter handle)
Most recent post: “Spice Girl Caravan to Srisailam India” [guest post by Evelyn Hills, author of Ivana and the Secret Lake Adventures: Magic vs. Love] (December 26, 2011)

Where are you spending the holidays this year?
I’ll be spending half the time at home in the jungle lowlands of Oaxaca and half the time climbing Mount Pico de Orizaba to gather material for my next book, Fresh Wind and Strange Fire.

What do you most like doing during the holidays?
Experiencing fresh snow, warm fires, soulful music and the goodness of family.

Will you be on or offline?
Online, drunk and probably naked.

What’s the thing you most look forward to eating?
Mashed yams with cashew sprinkles, steamed kale with olive oil/balsamic vinegar dressing, turkey with cranberry relish…

If you could travel anywhere for Christmas, where would it be?
Now that political-correctness has shown us how to rid the world of evil and suffering, I’d like to go back in time to when the cartoon Rudolph The Red-Nosed Reindeer was first broadcast, and fix a few things:

  1. I’d encourage Rudolph to walk off the job on Christmas Eve, find a lawyer and file a suit against Donner and Blitzen for bullying,
  2. I’d tell off Ms. Claus for turning a blind knitting eye to the hostile work environment and that fat cat Santa for sexual harassment in his constant ill-defined references to the North Pole.
  3. I’d rename the Abominable Snow Monster as the Indominable-spirited Snow Person of White Color.
  4. I’d dub the Island of Misfit Toys as the Differently-enabled Toy Cooperative and organize a special sports competition to which Barbie, Ken, and that machismo G.I. Joe are not invited.

Then we’d all live happily ever after — in a fairy-tale sense.

What famous person do you think it would be fun to spend New Year’s Eve with?
I’d like to be in a smoky cafe in Argentina with sultry music, steak, pasta and red wine, sharing literary conversation and long glances with Jane Austen.

Can you recommend any good books you’ve read this year?
Santa’s book of whose been naughty and nice in the expat and travel worlds.

What’s been your most displaced holiday experience?
On December 24th 2008, I was displaced from the palace of an elegant and voluptuous Saudi princess, after I attempted to demonstrate a “traditional Christmas goose.” I still fantasize about returning and showing her how to do a “traditional Christmas stuffing.”

How about the least displaced experience — when you’ve felt the true joy of the season?
When Displaced Nation contacted me about doing this, I immediately got misty-eyed and felt a part of this family of nomads, Bedouins, and international drug mules (hahahahaha). I fondly imagined the big cash payment Displaced Nation will send me so that my son Tiny Tim will finally have the operation he needs. Merry Christmas and God bless us every one.

On the first day of Christmas, my true love said to me:
FIVE GOOOOOOOFY EXPATS.
FOUR ENGLISH CHEESES,
THREE DECENT WHISKIES,
TWO CANDY BOXES,
& AN IRISHMAN IN A PALM TREE!

STAY TUNED for tomorrow’s featured nomad (6/12) in our 12 Nomads of Christmas series.

If you enjoyed this post, we invite you to register for The Displaced Dispatch, a round up of weekly posts from The Displaced Nation, with seasonal recipes, book giveaways and other extras. Register for The Displaced Dispatch by clicking here!

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4 responses to “12 NOMADS OF CHRISTMAS: Lyn Fuchs, American expat in Mexico (5/12)

  1. Miss Footloose | Life in the Expat Lane December 29, 2011 at 4:02 am

    Thanks for the laugh. Wouldn’t mind being in a cafe in Argentina right now. More cheery than here in Moldova, where it’s cold, gray and wintry. Have a happy, adventurous and healthy New Year!

    • Lyn Fuchs December 30, 2011 at 4:35 pm

      Happy New Year to you too, Karen. I need to visit Moldova someday. Hope I can stop by for some Gouda cheese, sliced green apples and Heineken with your most literary Dutch self.

  2. Kate Allison January 8, 2012 at 11:49 am

    Hi Lyn – Well, thanks to your suggestions for improving “Rudolph The Red Nosed Reindeer”, we’re expecting a slice of the payout from Donner and Blitzen’s unhappy law firm any day, so tell Tiny Tim to hang in there. Echoing Miss Footloose – Thanks for the laugh, and Happy New Year!

  3. Lyn Fuchs January 9, 2012 at 11:56 am

    Happy New Year to you too, Allison. Being half Irish, I become more sensitive to the oppression of the red-nosed with each bottle I empty.

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